British Website Pokes Fun At Fat American Ship Captains

The limeys over at shiptalk.com, a London based website nobody actually reads, think American ship captains are fat pieces of amphibious sh!t. Sure this is an April fools joke but still, WTF?

A spate of wheelhouse accidents have led calls for a change of rules on ship seating. A number of ship Masters have been injured through “seat related incidents” over the past month. Three separate accidents on US flagged vessels have forced the USCG to issue new guidance on “Captain’s chairs”, after they dramatically broke under strain.
According to one accident report from a bulk carrier, ”the Master, Captain Javier Arsfeldt, was returning from making a coffee and grabbing a few muffins, he sat down only for the seat to snap sending the shaft rapidly upwards causing some severe problems”. The two other incidents are understood to be of a similar nature – though thankfully due to the area of injury no entry wounds were evident.
The companies involved are now undergoing a process of rigorous seat testing. However, until the authorities can be satisfied with the safe working load of Captain’s chairs they have imposed a new limit of 266lbs. Scales must be provided on the wheelhouse at all times.
A USCG guidance note has been sent to vessels (NVIC 04-01), amongst the advice Masters and senior officers are advised to, “sit gently” and “avoid uncessary or rapid movement”. Where possible the advice is for Masters to be assisted by crewmembers when sitting down.

http://www.shiptalk.com/?p=8302

“sit gently” and “avoid uncessary or rapid movement”.
Didn’t some President say that?
Perhaps it was said to him.

You sure this is a joke… shouldn’t be. There are plenty fat unmotivated, self depricating, lazy,esteemless, slobs on the water and we have the broken chairs to prove it!!

[QUOTE=Smokenm20;104614]You sure this is a joke… shouldn’t be. There are plenty fat unmotivated, self depricating, lazy,esteemless, slobs on the water and we have the broken chairs to prove it!![/QUOTE]

Note the corpulent captain’s name, “Arsefeldt” as in “I wonder how his…” The reference to a 12-year old NVIC was also a giveaway. Good try, but could have been better.

[QUOTE=“Smokenm20;104614”]You sure this is a joke… shouldn’t be. There are plenty fat unmotivated, self depricating, lazy,esteemless, slobs on the water and we have the broken chairs to prove it!![/QUOTE]

There is some truth to this…however, more pertinent to galley chairs. We have 2 out of 3 broken chairs by not so slim crew members.

I brought the same topic up with our safety guy in the office. I asked him whose responsibility is it if you’re getting a class III ladder (the heaviest built they make) and it has a weight limit of 300 pounds and the deckhand weighs 3 25. I said to them should the employee be terminated their too fat? Silence

[QUOTE=jdcavo;104620]Note the corpulent captain’s name, “Arsefeldt” as in “I wonder how his…” The reference to a 12-year old NVIC was also a giveaway. Good try, but could have been better.[/QUOTE]

I found the whole thing to be completely LAME and not worth the electrons needed to reply but I must also note the unique reference to the chair pedestal inserting itself…THIS COMING FROM A FUCKING BRIT! IF THERE IS ANY NATIONALITY THAT KNOWS ABOUT HAVING LARGE STICKS UP THEIR ARSES IT IS THEY!

[B][I]FUCK THEM & THEIR HORSES TOO![/I][/B]

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