Lets get real. Did it ever occur to you that he’s not on a boat when he says he’s gone? If he has a side piece that may explain why he is cryptic or completely avoids talking about his job.
I can understand being too busy to do much more than to have a quick chat while he’s underway but doesn’t being tired whenever you try to make conversation about his work raise any alarms with you???
Any mariner that finds a female who would at the very least feign interest, even remotely, would usually jump on going blah blah blah about it. And most females after about 20 seconds regret asking about it in the first place!