Thanks for your input guys It really helps!!
Cool thread, lots of wisdom. Any major purchase/investments buy used. And guitars are considered good investments.
Yeah, I’ll drink to that…
[QUOTE=z-drive;125428]But you really do need the big lift, diesel and “dry” exhaust stacks.[/QUOTE]
I guess it depends on the level of compensation . . .
Or the size of your pecker.
It’s all about the right chick. Easy as that. Hoes love your money and Jody’s cock.
Yes…like they have said, you have to hold out for a good one. Several ex girlfriends just wanted to be around, and not really do shit.
The wife works hard in corporate, but while i am on my time off she often works from home a few days a week so we can make up for some of the time…yes she is working, but no rush to leave in the AM, we can have lunch together, and go do whatever errands together during the day etc. It should also work out well when we have children soon.
I think the best part is she’s in the same income bracket as myself, more or less. Nurses, at least in the Northeast are a good choice as well. They understand weird hours and make decent $.
Spot on and same situation here.
[QUOTE=“z-drive;125644”]
I think the best part is she’s in the same income bracket as myself, more or less. Nurses, at least in the Northeast are a good choice as well. They understand weird hours and make decent $.[/QUOTE]
I think you are wrong about the best part of being married to a nurse. The best part is Jody is a Doctor.
[QUOTE=Flyer69;125638]Or the size of your pecker.[/QUOTE]
Well, yeah, that is what I meant; what was I thinking trying to be a bit indirect. . .
Mine isn’t a nurse, but you’re fucked either way. Just a risk we’re willing to take.
One of my Old Skippers answered this question and in all my years of sailing I have found that his wisdom rings very true. "The Type of Woman that you need to Run Your Home while you are gone is the Type of Woman that will Drive You Nuts while you are home. If you have a wife / Girlfriend that calls you for every little thing that goes wrong you are not going to be a very happy camper. Now on the other hand, when the she tells you that the car through a rod ad that she has already “had it taken care of” you really need to bite your tongue and let her take care of it as we can not be there to FIX everything and just about the worse thing to do is Second Guess any woman that is willing to take charge and run the household while we are gone. It is also not fair to expect them to Stop running said household just because we are home.
Now my First Ex-Wife (man that pisses off my present wife when I say that please no not tell here) feel into the group that would fall apart if the batteries in the TV Remote died. (Man that divorce was expensive but worth every penny) My Second wife is the total opposite. Her new car was acting up and she was getting the run around from the Dealership and I told her that I would go down there. Well, you would have thought I killed her puppy a the way that she went off on me. And you what she was Right! I had to back off and let her continue running things, which she did and even well into my retirement still does quite well.
Yeah, I think I’m over compensating… '92 honda civic hatchback… Get some funny looks when me and my deckhand get out of that car. He’s 6’8" 280, I’m just a little guy, 6’2" 220, both with wild beards and hair. And, uh, sorry Boss, I can’t tow that air compressor/welder/generator/whatever.
I’m an aspiring mariner too. I don’t want to hijack the thread but I have a question and for some reason the site isn’t letting me post it. I’m applying to the Piney Point apprenticeship program and am writing the letter they require about why I want to become a mariner. I basically wrote I like the pay and the benefits offered, I like that there’s an opportunity to advance through the ranks, that I want to be a QMED and eventually become a junior engineer but that I’m open to the able seaman route if it suits me better, that I’ve researched the maritime industry and learned it’s projected to grow faster in the next ten years than other industries, that I have spoken with current/former sailors, that my family backs me up in my decision, that I like how the hours are scheduled (28/28, 28/14) so that I can get my work done in large chunks and have a few weeks off at a time to enjoy life, that have experience with/enjoy physical labor, that I like the sea, being on ships and am not afraid of the ocean and finally, that I promise to complete the program and give my best effort to every task at hand, no matter how big or small. Am I missing anything? Thanks in advance for any replies. Sorry for asking this question in this thread.
Some of the things that will come up are people messing with you, saying crap about your spouse out hooking up while you are at sea. Not saying it NEVER happens, but it is a trust issue, and the biggest is COMMUNICATION with your spouse. People ask me how it is, and I tell them when you are on, you are on, and when you are off you are OFF!!! It can be tough. My wife sailed for about 3 years, and we wanted to have kids so she stopped. Her Dad was a commercial fisherman and was gone for up to 8 months at a time, so I am lucky in the fact that she understands. GO FOR IT!! It is a fun and unique career.
I think if you’re in your twenties, early thirties it’ll be hard, for both parts, seeing this is the time of expectations and such, forties, life starts hitting many people right in the nose and they find out, can’t have it all, ay.
My entire family compensates as merchant mariners…uncles, aunts, cousins…
[QUOTE=Tim Coon;125323]Im considering a career as a merchant marine because it seems like an exciting lifestyle. But someday i would like to have a wife and kids. I am worried that this job would make it impossiable. Have any of you been able to make it work? How often do you hear it not working? Tips? Advice? Stories? Thank you[/QUOTE]
I don’t know that I would call it an exciting lifestyle. 
But it’s definitely a lot more fun when you’re single. There are many of us out there who moved ashore once we got married and had kids.
Do I miss sailing? Yep, so maybe it is kind of an exiciting lifestyle after all…
The spouse part is doable. Kids … meh. Not quite so much. I write about it here (and throughout, actually): http://crewboatchronicles.blogspot.com/2013/12/a-modest-proposal.html
[QUOTE=“txh2oman;125952”]The spouse part is doable. Kids … meh. Not quite so much. I write about it here (and throughout, actually): http://crewboatchronicles.blogspot.com/2013/12/a-modest-proposal.html[/QUOTE]
Entertaining read, but not a new concept. Building teams is the most difficult job. Then maintaining it is almost impossible. It makes the difference between mediocrity and greatness. I am not sure who wrote this article, but I know that good things are in your future. When I was on a crew boat team building was a lot easier than it is now. When you only have 6-8 it is a lot easier, but even with 192, in my case the principle is the same. You get the core 6-8 to buy in and you work on the rest. It may be painful and you may lose a few, but the results are undeniable.
I’m an army brat… and kids will pretty much “get used to” whatever their own particular version of normal is. I moved every single year for the first 12 years of my life. My father was deployed for long periods of time (pre skype/internet days) and we turned out “just fine”. Will kids miss their father when he’s not there? Yes. Will you miss important events in your kid’s life? Yes. Will this ruin their life? NO. Everyone is dealt a different hand of cards in life. Some kids may have their dad around all the time… but he may be a horrible father… or they struggle financially. After a certain point in time, the kids just understand that it is the way it is. The bonus may be that you actually spend more time with them when you are home than a "regular dad with a daily job) might. Shoot, these days, kids may be lucky to have a father in their life at all with divorce rates and absentee fathers (baby daddy syndrome). So, you are a good dad who can’t be there physically is not the end of the world. You can be in touch with the internet (yeah… this is a little easier with the older kids… I know)… phone calls and you probably will have some tall tales to tell them when you come home.
The wife is probably going to be the key person in your decision. She is going to be the one putting the good face on the absence. She is the one who will have to deal with the house, car, kid issues while you are far away and in no position to help. It will help if she has interests of her own (beyond ladies nights out with the girls which WILL lead to trouble) that can occupy her while you are gone. Making the most of the time you DO have together is important. It might be harder when she is younger and more interested in going out on the town, but if she is the right one, she will understand the means to an end… the job means you CAN do and afford more than if you were working shoreside. Of course, there could be things that would tip the apple cart… like if you had a sick parent… or disabled child… but all things being equal, it can actually work well with the right woman.