How about these job requirements?

Maritime Employment
#1

You must have every endorsement known to mankind, no tobacco, clean shaven, and no tattoos. I bet their doors are being stampeded with applicants.

Captain (Corpus Christi) compensation: [B]Daily Wage[/B]

           Seeking Captain. Must have TWIC and MMC, Passport and live in  the local Corpus Christi area. Master 500 Gross Registered Tons-  unlimited, Towing Endorsement, OICNW, RFPNW, GMDSS Operator. Reports to  the General Manager and Port Captain. Responsible for maintaining tug in  a state of readiness to respond to vessel assignments; operating vessel  safely and efficiently at all times; supervising crew and ensuring they  follow all safety procedures; oversees the preventive maintenance and  upkeep of the interior and exterior parts of the boat; maintains the  tugboat logs and timekeeping records for payroll purposes; acts as  Vessel Safety Officer. Must be clean-shaven, tobacco free, and have no  visible tattoos. Subject to pre-employment and monthly random Drug  Testing.

http://corpuschristi.craigslist.org/trp/4583630728.html

#2

Sounds like Signet.

#3

That’s them

#4

…Must also be a virgin, preferably a eunuch.

#5

What did they do if they took on the guys from Harvey gulf? Surely some of them have tattoos and use tobacco?

#6

Lol surprised if doesn’t say “must have attended a maritime academy and been part of the regiment.”

…there are companies that require such, even for shoreside!

Clean shaven in the tugboat business, give me a break! Best of luck.

#7

[QUOTE=z-drive;141398]Clean shaven in the tugboat business, give me a break! Best of luck.[/QUOTE]

what is their pay like although I say EFF YOU to the clean shaven BS. Unless you have to wear a respirator but even then a mustache should be ok!

#8

Somebody showed that to me so I had to share. Pretty sure that a real lawyer could find grounds for discrimination somewhere within these parameters. Maybe their ad should say, “seeking captains with zero individuality that will drink our kool aid.”

#9

[QUOTE=capitan1962;141402]Somebody showed that to me so I had to share. Pretty sure that a real lawyer could find grounds for discrimination somewhere within these parameters. Maybe their ad should say, “seeking captains with zero individuality that will drink our kool aid.”[/QUOTE]

If you are a muslim fundamentalist you can claim discrimination that a Billie Gibbons beard is a religious necessity. Of course, can anyone imagine a Texas tugboat company hiring a single muslim for crew?

Would love to see an entire tug manned with Taliban members…

have to be careful thought drinking in the bars near the docks…they might want to go blow up the infidels with suicide vests!

#10

I remember way back when I transferred from one fleet to another one inside the same company. The new Fleet had a No facial hair policy. While I thought it was B.S. especially for a Chief (maybe for a Tankerman) so anyway off went my old growth beard. So, I get onboard my new vessel and I was going through all of the Fleet Notices to get up to date and what is the first one that I read??? You got it, they had just repealed the Facial Hair Policy. I looked like a raccoon as my face was nice and tan but was Very White where the beard used to be.

The way I see it is they can set any rules that they want but ALL of the rules must be enforced equally! If you are told up front that there are rules that you do not like DO NOT take the job. I used to hate the way guys would sit around and bitch about rules that they damn well knew were in place before taking the job!

#11

This time of year after my off-time fishing everyday and letting the beard go my whole time away joe-boss jokes that I look a little (naught word). Maybe its how it curls?

My entire crew has facial hair. I’d say 3/4 of the towboatmen I’ve ever worked with do too. This is a travesty! I am surprised a beard isn’t part of the new STCW? Or at least something the NMC can nickel-and-dime you on

#12

[QUOTE=z-drive;141409]This time of year after my off-time fishing everyday and letting the beard go my whole time away joe-boss jokes that I look a little (naught word). Maybe its how it curls?

My entire crew has facial hair. I’d say 3/4 of the towboatmen I’ve ever worked with do too. This is a travesty! I am surprised a beard isn’t part of the new STCW? Or at least something the NMC can nickel-and-dime you on[/QUOTE]

Yes that is total BS, an officer in the Navy can wear a beard but not somebody who runs an un-inspected tugboat. I bet the owner of that company is a big supporter of our Kenyan born leader too.

#13

I’ve heard he is a Jesus freak? Not that there’s anything wrong with but allegedly Jesus is a big part of the game.

#14

I cannot imagine a tugboat crew where everybody is clean shaven, doesn’t smoke and/or dip, with no visible tattoos. If he indeed was able to find find one that falls within these limitations by all means please post a picture of said crew. These might be possible candidates but I kind of doubt they have all of the necessary STCW endorsements

#15

I wonder about drinking in your time off…I would assume it is also prohibited by these rules.

#16

[QUOTE=z-drive;141420]I wonder about drinking in your time off…I would assume it is also prohibited by these rules.[/QUOTE]

Yes and probably also are required to attend church and bring proof of attendance, see only PG rated movies, avoid dining in restaurants that serve alcohol, and by all means you cannot attend any rock concerts. They are strictly the work of the devil.

#17

[QUOTE=z-drive;141411]I’ve heard he is a Jesus freak? Not that there’s anything wrong with but allegedly Jesus is a big part of the game.[/QUOTE]

That can’t be right … he was bearded, wasn’t he? Oh yeah, and white … with blue eyes.

In all seriousness, I’ve attended some classes with guys from Signet, and they were (all three) tattooed and tobacco users. They said it’s tough to get in, easier once you’ve been there a while … less scrutiny after onboarding. Good pay and bennies for essentially a day job. They were happy.

#18

[QUOTE=txh2oman;141422]That can’t be right … he was bearded, wasn’t he? Oh yeah, and white … with blue eyes.

In all seriousness, I’ve attended some classes with guys from Signet, and they were (all three) tattooed and tobacco users. They said it’s tough to get in, easier once you’ve been there a while … less scrutiny after onboarding. Good pay and bennies for essentially a day job. They were happy.[/QUOTE]

It looks like those guys are on the way out to be replaced by clean shaven yuppies or good clean christian boys. Speaking of which, maybe Tim Tebow could find a job there, I heard he was available.

#19

[QUOTE=c.captain;141399]what is their pay like although I say EFF YOU to the clean shaven BS. Unless you have to wear a respirator but even then a mustache should be ok![/QUOTE]

They didn’t specify whether they meant face, or legs or…

#20

My beard is tattooed on.