Feminist creation mythology

After three weeks in the Garden of Eden, God came
to visit Eve. ‘So, how is everything going?’ inquired God.

‘It is all so beautiful, God,’ she replied. 'The
sunrises and sunsets are breathtaking, the smells,
the sights, everything is wonderful, but I have just
one problem.

It’s these breasts you have given me. The middle one
pushes the other two out and I am constantly
knocking them with my arms, catching them on
branches and snagging them on bushes. They’re a real

And Eve went on to tell God that since many other parts
of her body came in pairs, such as her limbs, eyes,
ears, etc… She felt that having only two breasts
might leave her body more ‘symmetrically balanced’.

‘That’s a fair point,’ replied God, ‘But it was my first
shot at this, you know. I gave the animals six breasts,
so I figured that you needed only half of those, but I see
that you are right. I will fix it up right away.’

And God reached down, removed the middle breast and
tossed it into the bushes .

Three weeks passed and God once again visited Eve in the
Garden of Eden.

‘Well, Eve, how is my favourite creation?’

‘Just fantastic,’ she replied, ‘But for one oversight. You
see, all the animals are paired off. The ewe has a
ram and the cow has her bull. All the animals have a
mate except me. I feel so alone.’

God thought for a moment and said, ‘You know, Eve, you
are right. How could I have overlooked this? You do
need a mate and I will immediately create one from
a part of you. Let’s see…where did I put that useless tit?’

1 Like

now that’s just STOOPID…

moral of the story: if you know what to do with tits, you never need to be alone?

[QUOTE=c.captain;192143]now that’s just STOOPID…[/QUOTE]

Maybe Em is right. You’re just a grumpy old man.

[QUOTE=Emrobu;192146]moral of the story: if you know what to do with tits, you never need to be alone?[/QUOTE]

Or three strikes you’re out?

[QUOTE=Lee Shore;192151]Maybe Em is right. You’re just a grumpy old man.[/QUOTE]

NYAH! Go peddle yer papers…