When people ask what you do for a living

Ashore nobody has a clue to the life we have led or lead and it is indeed hard to explain to people who are so totally ignorant. The common believe was that we had a life of pleasure filled with booze and women. I used to leave it at that…

Also my father who disagreed strongly with my career choice. - don’t throw away your life and future, you can do so much better - had no idea. When somebody asked him where his son worked he used to say: “My son does not work he is at sea”. Yes, 24/7 on tankers and in one occasion even for two years on the same ship.

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Sometimes when my wife and I are meeting someone new at one point they’ll say something like “so you’re gone for several months then home for several months, that must be hard, how do you do it?”

I tell them “yes, it is hard, but my wife and I just try to get along as best we can till it’s time for me to go back to work.”

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I get that question a lot to. I just say it keeps it fresh and makes her miss me every now and then. If not, and I was home all the time in certain she would have killed me by now.

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I yearn to be on a rotation again. my marriage hit some really hard times last year…home more with less money.
we are adapting and working on it though.

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I just say “I drive ships”. This is inevitably followed by a series of questions which I no longer enjoy answering. I try and get the questions answered as quickly as possible and change the subject.

I am internet dating so one of the first questions I always get is “how long are you gone for?” Meeting a women then leaving for 35 days to 4 months hasn’t been working out too well.

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Well Blaine I feel your pain.

I cook and when I tell people that and then mention that the hardest part of my job is seeking out (un) sack-fruit for picky captains…well, then it gets really weird.

Maybe I should leave that part out.

Congrats on the upgrade and hopefully see you around one of these days.

Scott

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If I’m feeling flip I say “suck, squeeze, bang, blow” or “uppy-downy-to-roundy-roundy.” Otherwise I say “mechanic,” or “technician,” and leave it like that.

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My favorite recent question was, “How long is your commitment?” “Well I could quit at any time but I’m fairly committed to paying my mortgage.”

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I’m telling you, that sack fruit is not good. No man should have to eat sack fruit… hahaha

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Oh, yeah. I feel for you, because my life was similar back in the day, except there were no dating websites. It is a wonder I got married while I was sailing and then even stayed married (for a while, anyway - no longer) when I came ashore, because being around the house all of the time was a shock to both of us. . .

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When I was working on tankers I would tell them (much to my wife’s chagrin); “I pump gas for a living.”

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I think I may just start telling people I’m a bus driver…

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I would so use that line if I was on a product tanker.

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After finishing Academy I got my first assignment as 3rd Eng. on a general cargo vessel, contract duration one year . No homeport call. We sailed between Italy and Persian gulf supplying marble from Marina di Carrara to the Emirates. I was freshly engaged and waited for that special letter to end this engagement. Well, it never came and I’m married to that same woman now for 45 years. With 46 years in the business this is quite an impressive cake. I cared for the financial support, my wife cared for the kids and if things went difficult after some weeks at home I just got another assignment.
My daughters are grown up and well established but I still get this twinge when hearing them say, well, we didn’t miss you so very much at that time…
Nowadays I am not so much socially hardwired but I feel well and think I did all right in my life.
If people ask me what I did I usually say, well, I studied the people on this earth at their roots :slight_smile:

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As your friend I fully believe she would kill you lol

Back in my days out there (lol, you’ll get it) I just told people that I worked on a supply boat in the GoM oil field. Usually they got the point.

I always think it’s funny when I hear charter “captains” act like they’ve been in big stuff, riiiiiight

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I think it’s funny when GOM Captains think they’ve seen big stuff, riiiiight

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Just busting your balls, but it’s all relative. 6-8 foot in the Gulf on a 38’ Charter boat are a MF’er.

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I often say “I sail” … if I want to talk. If I don’t I say “mariner” but either way, it often leads to further questions.
Once they get a clue what you do then often they figure it a glorious job which I don’t dissuade them from, then they’re jealous and drop the subject but it ALWAYS amazes me that I have never met one person who had a inkling what its’ like.

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America for ya. Maritime anything is not part of the culture. Not even coastal communities, unless you’re in New England.
In Northern Europe almost everybody will at least know the terms, words for everything from OS up to Master, even if they don’t know what each entails.

Los Angeles is a good example of how truly oblivious people are. I mean, the nearby neighborhoods/towns were built because of the industry. Ships of all types are an hourly sight. No idea of what is what. If I say I work on boats/ships, I get “oh, like cruise?” or “what do you normally fish for?”
And that’s best case scenario.

Most people have no clue. My wife had no idea there were jobs on the water other than the SI Ferry until she met me. And she took the ferry to the city everyday lol.