If there was a steering problem, causing the JSM to suddenly veer into the path of the tanker at high speed, no amount of AIS would have helped here.
I do agree that the paranoia with not being detected is causing a lot of problems for the USN. First they spend a lot of money on being as small a radar target as possible, run dark except for nav. lights and without AIS signals, then they appears to believe that others have to stay out of their way and doesn’t follow normal navigation rules.
Since they are not at war with any maritime powers at the moment they should not have anything to fear from being detected by other vessels in their vicinity. As others have pointed out, anybody interested in their movements can get that from any number of sources.